(A.) Imagine you're an actor suddenly thrown into the murky world of the movie, Matrix, and nobody's told you your lines! You have to respond immediately to the other actors — Your life depends on it — Even now you are being prepared to
recognize codewords,
possible responses
& some analysis
of what is going on. Best of luck!

are
—Who's complaining?
—How's that?
[ambush]

aren't
—Pretty much.
—It's overwhelming.
[bait & switch]

can't
—That's new.
—Totally demanding.
[marginalization]

don't
—If ever.
—It's unbelievable.
[comeuppance]

I'm
—What if?
—A joke.
[the brush off]

lucky
—God knows!
—It's chilling.
[tight corners]

should
—Oh, definitely!
—Beyond belief.
[false accusation]

shouldn't
—It's ridiculous.
—I'm easy.
[presumption]

that
—Or else!
—Screwy, huh?
[pushing your buttons]

up
—What if?
—Just anything!
[bedeviling]

why
—Go on!
—What's next?
[stabs in the dark]

you
—Who, me?
—Certainly not.
[vindictiveness]

The actors aren't here, on the screen. They're up there on the surface of the planet, where you are! Remember that!

(B.) The baseball players in the diamond below have enormous self-esteem — They're the best of the best — And they're being paid a lot of money! Experienced ball players are predisposed to stick up for themselves, and not easily rattled. In the diagram below, each of the nine fielders has prepared a self-defense in advance. Pretend you are a heckler in the front row of the bleachers, and try to come up with a taunt that will rattle every one of the players. However, if just one player has a good response, your razz won't work, and you'll be the laughingstock of the stands.

Here's an example: A heckler cries out, "Oh, it can't be that bad!" and the First baseman thinks, "—Maybe not," while the Center fielder thinks, "—Very different." Notice how difficult it is attack people who are defending themselves in advance.

(C.) Express the following two words in as many different ways as you can, varying your tone of voice, emotional cadence, rate of delivery, implied meaning, and level of seriousness each time. Try to make the two words sound good, friendly, evil, angry, vicious, or musical. Think about your parents.

Really? Man!

(D.) taxi1010.com fosters understanding in communication with outlanders, especially if they're being illogical, posturing, or trying to get you to work too hard. In both international peace negotiations, and in everyday life, you can establish trust through what US Senator George Mitchell (D-Maine) calls, "a chronology of confidence-building transactions, quite precise, agreed-on in advance, composed of concrete statements and actions," thus becoming partners in a new process. This works between nations, and between children. Imagine you are on the playground in the fifth grade, and someone, in passing, cries out, "Dope!" [some careless hand-me-down epithet, thinking it's "their" idea] — Without certain experiences, or precise knowledge [a corresponding script], how would you know how to stick up for yourself? You were taught, instead of expressing yourself, to hide. People can't live not expressing themselves.

What to Say When a Boy or Girl Insults You

(E.) Although taxi1010 has eighty-eight categories, each packed with dozens of essential life scripts, we can build a Verbal Go-cart with just six responses. To get around in everyday life, we don't need any more. That's it. No more! That's enough.

Clutch: —How's that?

We'll start with a clutch, which is really a circuit breaker. When a boy or girl attacks you, they're frequently coming on a little too strong. By saying, "—How's that?" you momentarily stop them in their tracks, implicitly asking them to repeat themselves with a little less energy.

First Gear: —God knows!

Off to a jerky start, we sometimes meet another person with a superficial understanding of where they're coming from. For instance, they might be saying, "Have we met before?" or "Do you think they know it?" (without explicitly targeting, "they"), or plain old, "What's the weather going to be?" In each case, by saying, "—God knows!" we colloquially invite them to go on with their self-discovery in some sort of benign way. Notice instead of saying they're being superficial, we're saying we've just touched in a superficial way ... so far! And we're taking the blame.

Second Gear: —That's it.

This expression is really the workhorse of conversation. When things get a little precarious, the going gets rough, or we begin to feel a little frazzled and want to slow down, we can simultaneously express acknowledgment to the other person, and our desire to relax a little by saying, "—That's it." One afternoon my roommate came home from work and began asking me what day of the week it was. "Is today Wednesday?" he asked. I inwardly blamed him, thinking he was being weird, stupid, or immature, until I saw my negative feelings were interfering with my understanding. He was simply relaxing and being a child. "—That's it." Next day a South African financier in my taxicab kept coaxing me to say a little more about Non-escalating Verbal Self-Defense by acknowledging whatever I had to say with, "—That's it," harmoniously coaxing me on, encouraging me to regress a little and follow my inner child — not punish it!

Third Gear: —Ever hopeful.

It's funny. Once you start learning the constellations, starting with Orion, "The hunter," and above, Taurus, "The bull,", then directly to the left, Gemini, "The twins,", you never forget. You just keep building. Taking the bull by the horns, we discover a tiny person imitating his parents in disturbing or intimidating ways: "—Ever hopeful." One moment he's imitating his mother, the next moment he's imitating his father, twin aspects of the superego. If he has a schizophrenic sense of humor, he may take these incorporated attitudes and beliefs seriously, charging them with Animus, or the energy of the Id, becoming a bully. In his mind, he's just teasing you, saying things like, "Hey! You weren't here yesterday. Did you bring a note?" or "Geoff, you're losing your touch," or "He's going to correct me even as we speak." "—Ever hopeful."

Fourth Gear: —Be serious.

The most common tactic in verbal abuse ... wait a minute! Am I changing the subject! That's it! It's, well ..., what's that? It's changing the subject! In our culture, "I'm angry and want to kill you!" shortens to "I'll kill you!" or simply, "Fuck you!" Or, looking at this backwards, when someone says, "Fuck you!" they really can't articulate, "I'll kill you!" or "I'm angry and want to murder you!" The way out is to directly say, "—How's that?" (The clutch), followed by, "—Be serious," (Because they changed the subject), and finally, "—Cheer up!" (As if from a good parent to an angry child). Here's another example: "Is that your BMW?" "—That's it." "Did you pay for it?" (Changing the subject) "—Be serious." —There's more to life than counting money.

Fifth Gear: —Either way.

Here is where your parents' crowd polishes you off. No matter how well you've done, they say things like, "Just because you were valedictorian at Dartmouth doesn't mean you could be The President." "—Either way." They don't even have to expend much energy giving you the snub. After you've given them a heartfelt piece of your soul, your mother says, "Really?" and your father says, "You bet!" "—Either way." Or what about those dreadful long-distance telephone calls from both parents at once, one saying, "To be a writer, write from yourself," and the other chiming in, "You would be a great writer!" "—Either way." —What I've done is good enough. Like a pack of wolves, they circle for the kill: "That remains to be seen." "—Either way." —Hitch your wagon to a star.

Reverse: — ? ? ? ?

So far, our Verbal Go-cart has a clutch, "—How's that?" and five forward gears: "—God knows!" "—That's it," "—Ever hopeful," "—Be serious," and "—Either way." What two-word expression could we add for Reverse? Let's add something neutral, so when a street person says, "I'm the wrong guy to fuck with!" we can safely back away, or when someone anticipates negatively, we can back away from that, too: "This assignment's not so easy, huh?"

Icarus and the Gutter Snipe

(F.) This is an emergency. A gutter snipe has grabbed one of our Jedi Squires and savaged him.

We rescued Icarus just in time, and he's resting while we deal with the gutter snipe, who has severe problems.

The first thing we want to do is institutionalize the gutter snipe to diminish his importance.

Notice the sentences the guy repeats over and over, over here in the right column ==>

When we caught up with him, Icarus was flying high in a computer company in Malaysia. The gutter snipe turned out to be one of his supervisors!

What could Icarus do?

Well, he memorized the attacks and posted them on a bulletin board, where a few "well-meaning" people actually started attacking Icarus!

We pulled him out just in time!

Meanwhile, we've been running a taxi1010 analysis on the twenty-eight attacks Icarus reported, and to our astonishment, discovered twenty-eight different kinds of attacks! That's unheard of ... most people stick to one kind of attack ... and that's ultimately how we tracked down the gutter snipe!

Many people at the bulletin board encouraged Icarus not to leap in with the scoundrel, to which our Squire acceded!

Which is why we recommend his ascension to Knight.

You see, it's an energy tradeoff. Energy spent searching for keywords in an attack, and reaching for small, almost unnoticeable scripts, takes energy away from a wild urge to leap into the gutter!

Something Icarus learned well!

Now what the hell is that tugging on my toe ... ?

taxi1010
Analysis

Attacks From the
Gutter Snipe

taboos

(1.) "So how's it going with the girl you're after?"
—Pretty natural.

ambush

(2.) "Are you sure? I'm afraid you can never get the girl."
—How's that?

humiliation

(3.) "She's popular, and how is she supposed to like a person like you?"
—Not perfect.

complaining, denying it

(4.) "What's the point, Icarus? Every girl is too good for you."
—OUCH.

negative anticipation

(5.) "Icarus, if you need my help, let me know. I will recommend other girls for you. I know one chick who would probably be suitable for you. Both of you would be a very compatible match." [Pulls out a picture of a really fat girl]
—Far superior.

false accusation,
misdiagnosis

(6.) ["That is your ex-girlfriend?"] "She never had a boyfriend. Seriously, Icarus, you should consider asking her out sometime."
—Oh, definitely!

above it all

(7.) "Hey Icarus, who was the girl in the car with you?"
—Someone else.

glib posturing

(8.) "I am just curious to know which nightclub she's from."
—So foolish.

comments

(9.) ["What is a nightclub?"] "Oh my god, you don't know what a nightclub is? You must be a virgin."
—Oh, yeah!

deception

(10.) "So, how much did you spend for the girl? I hope she hasn't dried up your bank account yet."
—Well, okay!

second-guessing

(11.) "Icarus, don't get angry since the girl has gone with another guy. See I've told you, the girl will never like you."
—Too dangerous.

hocus-pocus

(12.) "So what are you going to do now? Ahhh ... remember the girl I showed you in the picture? Let me recommend her to you."
—Without stopping.

blurting

(13.) "Why not? I am actually trying to help you here. I am trying to be kind."
—Just don't!

intimidation

(14.) "Well, this girl is certainly better than the other one. She will not leave you, and she won't control you either. You don't want to be controlled like before, do you?"
—Ever hopeful.

vindictiveness

(15.) "Oh Icarus, I really pity you."
—Who, me?

sneers and jeers

(16.) "So Icarus, what are you doing on Friday night tomorrow?"
—Something else.

suggestion

(17.) "Going somewhere like pubs and bars again to try a pickup? Why are you going there? These places are not suitable for you. You will be rejected."
—Little challenges.

repulsion

(18.) "I am just telling you the truth. At least I don't get rejected like anyone else. The truth is out there."
—A natural.

regression

(19.) "Icarus, for your information, girls will only like guys who are winners."
—I'm sure.

puncturing, convoluting

(20.) "Allow me to help you, Icarus. I understand how you felt the last time you got rejected. I already knew it from the beginning when you were going after that girl, nothing mysterious here. And I knew you wouldn't succeed."
—That's all?

pulling rank

(21.) "Icarus, have you considered asking the girl who I recommended for you the other day?"
—It's insane.

free association

(22.) "Why not? She will be glad to go out with you ... Furthermore, you don't have to worry that you will overspend. This girl doesn't go for money. She goes for person."
—Beautiful, huh?

hyperbole, exaggeration

(23.) "Why are you showing your temper? I am trying to help you here. I am actually being a kind person. You should thank me for that."
—Must you?

baiting

(24.) "I heard you're after a new girl here. It looks like you don't like the girl I recommended. Anyway, the girl you're after is not quite bad. She never rejected anyone before."
—Big treat.

disparagement

(25.) "She has dated many guys before. She never disagrees going out with guys. She is basically an easy target."
—Almost impossible.

bait & switch

(26.) "I slept with her before as well."
—Very serious.

hit and run

(27.) "She slept with me months ago. Everyone knows that. HA HA!"
—Control yourself!

upstaging,
under their
thumb

(28.) "Well, do you know how to chase after girls? You seem to always fail."
—Way beyond!

Rough Guide for Getting Back to Yourself

(G.) My friend David Daniels says, "Life is as good as you think it is ... and if you're smart, you'll stop thinking about it altogether."

In ordinary life, people trick other people into forgetting themselves. They steal your attention. Here's a rough guide for getting back to yourself in rapidly changing circumstances.

When you meet another person out in the real world, begin to ask yourself the following questions:

(1.) What age do they come from? a. Are they primitive, like someone from the Middle Ages? b. Are they intelligent, like someone from the distant future? c. Or are they from some stage of evolution in between?

(2.) a. Are they operating from their Id, or instincts? Are they mostly interested in making love or killing? b. Are they operating from their Superego? Are they pinched, righteous, or only interested in punishing everyone? c. Are they operating from their Ego? That is, from their intellect, which is really a lens for observing what's going on inside themselves and outside themselves?

(3.) a. Are they law abiding, with an awareness of what effects they have on other people? b. Or are they criminal, with limited capacity for understanding pain inside themselves or in others? Are they looking for an introduction to a police officer, a judge, and a warden?

(4.) a. Are they following pleasure or pain? b. How much tension do they have? c. Can they hold onto pleasure, in hopes of obtaining even greater pleasure in the future? d. Are they regressing (as if they're around friends), or e. are they behaving like an adult, who can feed themselves and take care of themselves? f. Are they a responsible human being, behaving in ways you might behave, or g. an impostor using irrationality to throw people off balance, to separate them from their own personal experiences, to break their connection with themselves? h. Is it a real person or a phony? i. Do they steal your attention? j. Do they make sense?

(5.) Is their social life all an act? a. Are they "putting on the dog" to impress someone? b. Can you understand their "suggestive moves" in terms of third-grade behavior? c. Are they maintaining a "reputation" as athletic star, matchmaker, social critic, "problem solver," expert, class president or "easygoing" clown? d. Do you get the idea they don't really get a chance to talk to someone?

(6.) Are they easily humiliated? a. If you humiliate someone in public or act too smart, they'll try to kill you. This is no joke. If you are out on the street, they may come after you with a knife or a gun to try to "settle" something. As Jesus said, "Be wise as a serpent and humble as a dove." The best thing to do is get away — "Just give me three steps and I'm out of here!" b. If you humiliate someone in an organization, they'll have "behind the scenes" meetings to have you expelled, suddenly! — because "We know what's best." That's essentially what they did to Jesus: Stubborn, angry people, far removed, had him crucified. It's called, "the dead hand of the Church." So here's the antidote — real Indian magic — just like raising a flag: You pull something down, and something comes up, realizing, I don't have time for unhappy people.

The following table lists ideas and key words to listen for in a conversation, along with a two-word response you can use as a tool for getting back to your particular experiences and individual life — not to win anything, or prove you can outwit another person; instead, to provide a real path to being honest, connected, and alive. Hubba-hubba! —That's it.

"Life is what you think it is," David Daniels says, "and what it is is nothing."

(X.) If you were to add a new aspersion to the taxi1010.com database, such as the self-attack, «To be or not to be, that is the question.», how would you proceed? Hint: See, taxi1010.com as a finite state automaton ...