Theory of
taxi1010.com

Taunts, Insults or Attacks

Codewords Inside Aggressive "Tricks"

"Wings" to Fly
Back to Yourself

Backup
"Ideas"

Six Choices

Essays | Art

Street Smarts

Presskit | Publicity

Feedback

Periscope

Site Map

Kids' Pages

Milestones

The Way Out

 

CLINIC

PATIENT

DIAGNOSTIC

Patient refers to it as stargate-one-oh

A Cajoler.2

Hatred.2

 

TOOLSET

INFORMAL FALLACY

 

—Don't worry.

—Pony up!

First try!

—Anything else?

Moxie's

Disease

 

Question-Begging Epithets — Emotionally loaded words, controversial phrases, name calling, dyslogistic language (conveying censure), or eulogistic (complimentary) language invites someone to prejudge the issues simply by our choice of words. Charged-up emotions brought about by prejudicial language can conceal the relevant facts.

 

NOTES TO MYSELF

PSYCHOLOGICAL AGE

CLASS

[3rd party interference] - Dumb people pretend they know everything. They're afraid to appear to be stupid, to ask simple questions. The smart people are always asking questions.

The Age of Domination, ages 0-3

Rules

 

 
 
 
 
 

Exactly what someone said [or did]
... usually not very original.

The thoughts of a "bad child"
... to free your mind again.

TRICKS

WINGS

IDEAS

"He was a charlatan."

—Pony up!

The secret protects itself ... Earned achievement leads to happiness ... You don't know how much trust matters until it's not there – It's hard to repair ... If you hold a question now, someday you will realize you have lived into the answer.

"You two should have a conversation." [From a "high-maintenance" beauty to two of her suitors]

First try!

—I just listen ... It's less trouble, actually ... Nothing forced is ever beautiful.

"What are you thinking?"

—Don't worry.

—You tell me first.

"Thanks for thinking about me." [From one of the school's "mean girls."]

—Pony up!

—Staring at people does not produce food ... It's not how you look at other people – It's how you look at yourself.

"I know what you're thinking."

—Don't worry.

—It's just what you're cooking up to torture yourself.

"What do you do, drive around all day thinking?"

—Don't worry.

—What do you want to ruin your life having fun for?

"WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?"

—Don't worry.

—Just one thing leads to another.

"Now you can get back to thinking big thoughts."

—Pony up!

—There's a lot of them – There always have been.

"Who's your daddy?"

—Pony up!

—Very awkward.

"Where did you buy it?"

First try!

—You think I was wasting my time? ... An arm and a leg for walking in ... The competition is fierce ... From out of nowhere! ... Out of this world ... The things you own end up owning you.

"Thank you for that lesson."

—Anything else?

—Harvard men are best at this.

"How come you have so much stuff?"

First try!

—It must have been my mother – She has syphilis.

"Are you going to B or to 1?"

—Anything else?

—I never let anyone push my buttons.

"Nobody wants to see you naked."

—Anything else?

Sure thing ... How can you dump someone if you can't see them?

"I have never loved you and I want a divorce."

First try!

—The movie generation ... If it isn't in a movie, it doesn't exist ... You really are mixed up ... Just don't tell me where you're going ... Don't tell anyone where you're going ... The unpopular side ... Because everything's wrong with me.

"Doesn't it seem as if Chelsea is sort of being pimped out in some weird sort of way?" (–MSNBC correspondent David Shuster)

—Pony up!

—It's one of the things that'll bring peace to the world.

[Someone trying to make you a laughingstock]

—Pony up!

—Do you feel better?

"I told Ricky to watch the puppy!"

—Don't worry.

—I just got home from school!

"I told you to watch the puppy, and Jimmy ran over it – It's dead."

First try!

—Don't blame me ... You did it! I didn't kill the dog! You did it!

"Earlier in the day, though, he said that his reasons for wanting to extend his term 'should be self-evident.'" [Referring to New York City Mayor Rudolph W. Giuliani, as reported in The New York Times]

First try!

—Everyone's a part of it.

"I would never undermine your authority in front of clients because that would be messing with your masculinity."

—Anything else?

—You can't, because your shoes are too big.

"I shouldn't have dogs."

—Don't worry.

—What kind of life is that?

"You have no idea what you're talking about."

—Don't worry.

—You'll see.

"You have no life."

—Don't worry.

—You know, if you don't do anything, you get weaker and weaker ... Lebanon means, The Land of Milk and Honey.

"Richard, people are different and they all have their own way – You can't push your way on them or tell them what to do."

—Pony up!

—I'm not going to talk about it anymore – Why should I give away pearls? ... Oh, look at all those colors! ... I'm not taking this seriously ... It's hopeless ... It's a virus talking about an elephant ... People only feel bad when they're not themselves ... A lot of what you feel is not ... It's what you imitated when you were a child ... I know I'm not always right ... Two people with mean mothers are not going to have a very nice time together ... "I'm not a pimple on your ambition and you shouldn't squeeze me." ... We should avoid these ends by avoiding these beginnings ... People incorporate wholesale the entire personality of the one they think is the most powerful ... One Jesus is enough ... If you imitate anyone else, you'll be you ... They have a name for it ... Monkeys is the craziest people! ... In the old days people had a lot of fun calling each other names ... You just have to let yourself ... You're my kind of artist! ... If you're near the sun, you can grow ... Like a thief that comes in the night.

"He's probably too eccentric for the corporate world."

—Don't worry.

—We'd know normal if we saw it, wouldn't we?

"He's weird because he only wants one kid."

—Pony up!

—Nobody has any money.

"You're not as patriotic as I am because you're not anti-French."

—Don't worry.

—Don't hate the players – Hate the game!

"How much do people pay for rent around here?"

—Don't worry.

—I don't think it matters ... Maybe you don't have to know any of that. [Also see, Boredom]

"How much do YOU pay for rent?"

—Don't worry.

—You can't move in!

"How much rent do you pay?"

—Don't worry.

—You don't even have to be there ... Never buy horses!

"Sam, why do you have a basket on the front of your bike like a little girl?"

First try!

—That's what YOU say.

"You should stay away from that stuff! That stuff turns to formaldehyde."

First try!

—Oh, at least.

"I don't know who my dad is porking now; he's always porking someone."

First try!

—It's like wrestling with a maniac!

["Aaaaa-CHOO!" "Oh, you've got a cold?"] "Just a little dandruff flying by."

—Pony up!

—You can have all the fun you want with it.

"Who isn't flawed?"

—Don't worry.

—You're not.

"Virginia, why don't you get that?" [Rotating European toilet seat]

—Anything else?

—It would be criminal to waste my life that way.

"Don't you want to buy one?"

—Don't worry.

—You can get away with anything when you're old.

"Did you buy it new?"

First try!

—You don't need anything.

"I don't really buy it."

First try!

—You don't have to.

"You bought it used?"

First try!

—More money to manage, huh?

["They're totally addicted to them." (Their dog treats)] "So, you are feeding an addiction."

First try!

—A pain in the ass!

"How much do you pay him, one or two dollars?"

—Don't worry.

—I've decided I'm never going to talk about money, and I'm never going to hear about it – Gee, that's really great.

"That's all right – It's only two dollars."

—Anything else?

—Like a buried treasure that never loses its luster.

"I'm not accusing you of anything."

First try!

—It's taken for granted.

"Are you sure you didn't drop it on the floor?"

—Don't worry.

—It's hard to believe, isn't it?

"GET YOUR ACT TOGETHER!"

—Anything else?

—And if they don't do it right, scold them!

"Why don't you sell your house and buy a house together?"

—Anything else?

—How could someone live a whole life and only know one thing? – Say no more! – I forbid you to talk about my property.

"Hey, Boris, you're going to die, man!"

—Anything else?

—Emerging into the sunlight.

"Unhappy with your shortcomings?"

—Don't worry.

—They're nothing!

"Your little white dog is beginning to be a problem."

—Anything else?

—I do everything people tell me not to do.

"Hey, Daryl, you're holding the newspaper upside down!"

—Pony up!

—I feel this incessant chatter about nothing is worthless.

"You should comb your hair, Peter."

—Anything else?

—Either way you win.

[Someone giving you a partial view down their blouse]

—Don't worry.

—There's no rush.

"Sorry for the spill!"

—Don't worry.

—It's like perfume to me.

"You should wax your eyebrows."

—Anything else?

—The next lesson is hair pulling – How to pull hair and scream.

"What are you trying to do to me?"

—Pony up!

—Are you trying to stifle my creativity?

"You assume too much."

First try!

—It looks like you walked into a good deal, but you never know!

"Thanks for telling me that."

—Don't worry.

—Past a certain point you can't.

"You're not listening to me, lady – I'm telling you what to do!"

—Don't worry.

—What a relief.

"And by the way, it's going to cost you seventy-five dollars to replace that ticket."

—Anything else?

—I'll bet you!

"Happy birthday!"

—Anything else?

—It was so nice when I was little.

"I hope my singing didn't scare you away."

First try!

—We lucked out this year!

"Just assume I never said that."

First try!

—You're important, too, you know.

"Oh, get over it!"

—Don't worry.

—Things are disguised.

"You're lucky you weren't disbarred."

—Don't worry.

—They can't get your goat if they don't know where it's tied.

"Stop hovering."

—Pony up!

—Any more butterflies of hate fluttering from level to level?

"Why are you so annoying all the time?"

—Pony up!

—Who wants to go and dress like a goat?

"You know what? You're bugging me."

—Anything else?

—So do you still believe everything your mind tells you?

"We think we might know what you're TRYING to say."

First try!

—It changes things sometimes.

"Gun owners are the new niggers of society."

First try!

—"Never underestimate the stupidity of the American people." (–P. T. Barnum)

"What do you do about it, in a nutshell?"

—Don't worry.

—Never start fights with rich guys! ... We never do.

"Somebody's taking that cash box! Call the police! Call the police!"

First try!

—They've been trained to be told what's right and wrong.

"Ritchie Junior here!" [Asking you to go along with an oblique insult]

First try!

—Dreamer!

"The assholes are winning."

—Pony up!

—How do you like that? – They're full of shit!

"Fucking dickless wonder!"

—Don't worry.

—So nuts, aren't they?

"I want a divorce."

—Anything else?

—We should throw a party! We should throw a no diapers party!

"I'm getting a divorce."

—Anything else?

—You're a very nice person.

"Let's get a divorce."

—Anything else?

—There's something nice about that, too.

"Why don't you masturbate before you go to work?"

—Anything else?

—Think of the potential.

"Do Italian women use dried salamis to masturbate?"

—Don't worry.

—It's the last thing you want to think about.

"How dare you owners be so happy!"

—Pony up!

—Some people are chosen.

"What kind of car do you have now?"

—Don't worry.

—I'm in charge of it – You don't have to worry anymore.

"You only have a million."

—Don't worry.

—The blues will make you happy, too.

"You don't even have a life."

—Don't worry.

—It pays to be an evil genius when you're on the web.

"You can't have it all."

—Don't worry.

—It's really not that much, is it?

"Have you read anything you said you read?"

—Don't worry.

—Now I neither fall asleep or put people to sleep.

"Do you have a/c in your taxi there?"

—Don't worry.

—What more could you want?

"Is it expensive? What do you have to pay for an apartment?"

—Don't worry.

—Well, I wouldn't worry about it.

"Where are you headed to?" [The hotel doorman wants to know, so later, he can extort a kickback from the taxi driver if it was a lucrative ride]

—Don't worry.

—No place like home.

"Do you have a bag? Do you have a bag? Do you have a bag?"

First try!

Do you have a cleanliness disorder?

"If you don't mind my asking, how much do you make in a year from a taxi medallion?"

—Don't worry.

—It all depends how angry you are.

"Whose rude child is that at the end of the table?"

—Pony up!

—Are you the woman I bit at the last full moon?

"Nice way to say curb your dog."

—Pony up!

—I'll get a plastic mirror so they can see themselves ... That's too much to ask, huh? ... It's another world, you know? ... They didn't go to Church, huh? ... I don't even have to ... I usually look.

"What database do you use?"

—Don't worry.

—Hey, I'm a Dartmouth man! – We're beyond all that.

"Who's the head of your Y2K effort?"

—Don't worry.

—Don't knock the Ivy League!

["I've lived in fourteen different states."] "Is your father in the military?"

First try!

—Show me a point, and I'll move the Earth.

"We can't go wrong being ourselves, or so I've heard."

—Don't worry.

—Just let it play out.

"Do you support freedom and the right to bear arms?"

—Don't worry.

—That's what happens when you get old – If someone bugs you, you just slam the door.

"You're losing us in this last paragraph."

—Pony up!

—I stay awake at night, listening to the wind.

"What the hell?!? If somebody can make some semblance of sense of that last guy's website please post and let me know what I'm missing! I'm quite perplexed by it, actually. And a little worried. I don't understand... .. ... ."

—Pony up!

—It cured me.

"Don't be too quick to judge people now."

First try!

—Go ahead and judge 'em! They don't care ... You might as well call a spade a spade, and an asshole an asshole.

"If you judge people, you have no time to love them."

—Don't worry.

—They judge themselves by what they do, and if they do well, they think they're great.

"I'm lost."

—Don't worry.

—You probably have some innate sense of goodness or decency.

"You lost me."

First try!

—The whole trick is to have tools and not answers.

"Have you done your taxes?"

—Anything else?

—Whatever happened to sitting around the fireplace and doing nothing?

"Have you lost your mind?"

—Don't worry.

—You could learn an awful lot from that.

"You're fired ... 'as a result of disruptive and insubordinate behavior towards your direct supervisor.'"

—Anything else?

—Well, according to MY attorney, "You have reduced the information and resources which you previously provided."

"You're fired!"

—Anything else?

—Don't trust your relatives!

"Then you're fired!"

—Anything else?

—Tell that to a piece of pottery!

"The honeymoon is over."

—Anything else?

—Who's the master – the machine or the man?

"Get your tongue out of my mouth!"

—Anything else?

—The secret room in the basement where screams cannot be heard – the ropes that do not leave burn marks.

"Paper or plastic?"

—Anything else?

—Whatever's closest to you.

"We're making a change."

—Anything else?

—I'm dying to hear ... Home run! ... That was over the wall ... You win ... That's what happens when you're old.

"You're making my family look bad."

—Pony up!

—A tragic waste.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
 

REFLECTIONS

 
 
 
 
 

22-MAY-1999. If you're like most people, you don't remember insults. Even if you hold one in your mind, you'll notice something like a hand reaching up from your unconscious and snatching it away. That's very clever! Just don't read any Freud. (1.) Perhaps ninety percent of your mind's potential is occupied in this way, just sitting there in a trance, poised to snatch unpleasantness from your awareness. It knows what's best for you. Right?

Then we notice a curious thing. The successful people in life seem to exhibit what you might consider cavalier stupidity or peevish immaturity. Remember Kojak, or Perry White on Lois and Clark? (Could those actors stimulate earliest memories of our father?) Or what about some of the Congressmen and women you see on TV? (Could the tensions we feel at them remind us of our mother?) Yet here we continue, trying so hard to be smart, to be grown-up, and to be liked.

One thing we know: The troubles in our lives are finite. We've seen almost everything more than once. As a matter of fact, maybe we can trace each of our problems back to an origin. Then we can brush aside disturbances almost before they begin. With any luck, we can reprogram a small portion of our memory-snatcher to help us. First we have to understand it. But wait a minute. Isn't our unconscious solving our problems already by helping us forget? Like a big goof it does! We need to remember. Unfortunately, the big memory-snatcher buried other things as well. It buried childlike wonder, magical abilities, keen insight, high-resolution perception, and tremendous energy. Along with pain.

Perhaps we can get under the lid of our consciousness and defuse its energy with some honest responses, so it has a chance to come out of its trance, recognize itself, and make our wildest dreams come true.

1. Freud, Sigmund, The Psychopathology of Everyday Life. Trans. Alan Tyson. New York: W.W. Norton & Company, 1960.


08-APR-2014.

 

Thick
of
It

ShortCuts

Top
of
Page

 

As follows

CODE WORDS: accusing, addiction, annoying, arms, assume, b, bear, beginning, [blouse], bought, bugging, buy, charlatan, comb, curb, dandruff, database, die, disbarred, divorce, dust, fired, fixed, flawed, floor, formaldehyde, freedom, have, headed, hovering, judge, junior, [laughingstock], lesson, lost, making, masculinity, masturbate, medallion, military, nutshell, ourselves, over, owners, paper, paragraph, patriotic, perplexed, pimped, plastic, police, pompous, porking, probably, puppy, rent, replace, self-evident, shortcomings, singing, spill, taxes, telling, thinking, together, tongue, trying, two, [undeniable], upside down, Virginia, wants, wax, who's, whose, winning, wonder

 

X
Caelum
"Chisel"

—Anything else?