"Passive witnesses to such behavior – other students, teachers or parents – who do nothing are coconspirators in the bullying behavior." (–Mark D. Smaller, Director, Analytic Service to Adolescents Program, Morton Alternative School, Chicago)

—What did the Chinese say? One order leads to ten thousand ... It's like making holes in the ocean ... You can just make gestures.

«Defend friend bully rude comeback school»

—Oh, don't let the pastor hear that!

"He could pick up some tips from you then."

—What I don't understand is, why aren't they all multimillionaires?

"GIVE ME THAT COCA-COLA CAN! – ONE, TWO, THREE ..." [Overhearing an eleven-year-old boy threatening his eight-year-old sister]

—What a slurp! What a cherry lifesaver she is! I haven't seen anything that nice in a long time ... WHY ARE YOU ASKING ME THAT, NEIGHBOR HANS? HAST THE DEVIL GOT THY TOE? ... That's pretty heavy, isn't it? Pretty heavy duty ... Nobody smart does anything like that ... THAT'S NOT CRICKET ... It's different ... YOU HAVE TO CHANGE YOUR WAYS ... You have to pay someone ... The Maharishi, 'The Little Man Who Lived With the Monkeys' ... In northern India ... Read The Wolf Man.

"I always feel I'm faking it."

—With a short temper! ... Every atom in our body was once a part of a star.

"Quit while you're ahead."

—Money, good cheer, intelligence, attention, light – There's only so much of these things in the world .. That's the way life is ... As long as you have yourself, you're not abandoned.

"Is this free?" [The bar stool on your left, from a group that's studiously ignoring you]

—They're on a fake ocean liner going to a fake heaven.

"Is this one taken?" [The bar stool on your right, from a reverend who's studiously concentrating on a pearl-studded Blackberry]

—You know, I'm beginning to see why people drink ... You go here, you go there ... The Knights of the Mystic Sea.

«How to come across non-defensive»

—Whatever it is, we'll see ... I don't know and I don't care and I don't ask ... That's a good case.

«How to make a verbal boundary»

—Just for shade ... Let me know when you settle down ... There were dolphins flying in the water and I thought of you ... She wants a toilet seat around her neck so she can enter the temple ... Sounds like my mother ... I'm telling you, it can get awfully awkward ... Will do! ... Revenge is mine! ... Hot shit! ... I know I got it wrong ... What about your freedom? ... I'll give you five dollars if you set me free ... You must never let them see they can knock you off ... They have a million ways ... You can paint any painting and people think it's good, because they can't paint anything ... What's the difference? ... It's just the idea of it ... Forget about it! ... Your mother must have been big on that ... Your mother's era ... By practice! ... You were brought up not to seek happiness ... If I were you, I would seek happiness ... Deep!

"When?" [Pressuring you for a date]

—I will tell you.

[Someone merely looking away without a thank you]

—That's good to say.

"Congratulations!"

—How about that?

["Okay! I made it on one hour's sleep!"] "Okay! Congratulations!"

—Looking good!

"I just want to congratulate you on your masterful air-conditioning work."

—Moves the hot air around.

"Timing is everything in life, isn't it?"

—When you find your ego, and the bottom falls out, you find happiness.

"This is the right timing – I was wondering how I was going to get in there."

—Keep calm and carry on!

"When is Easter?"

—Why should I tell you if you forget?

"I'll leave this with you so you can have it whenever you want it."

—Deep sea fishing.

"When in doubt."

—Maybe there's better than that.

"When your time is up, your time is up."

—It sucks the life out of you, this battle!

"Is this the last one?" [Harry Potter movie]

—We'll see what happens.

"Carry on!"

—You just do things with no idea how they'll turn out.

"I'm sorry – My mind is somewhere else."

—Everything is very authentic.

"What's your agenda for this trip?"

—You're not supposed to do something ... You're supposed to occupy a space .. If someone needs you, they'll find you, and if they don't, you're lucky!

"You speak Japanese? Does that help with tips?"

—Could I have one just to see what they're like?

[Your wife getting stoned and going to a B. B. King concert with some of your friends, pointedly without you]

—You finally did it! ... You finally ruined my day.

"I haven't seen you in a while. Where have you been hiding?"

—Behind everything.

"Excuse me while I take this call."

—Are you in the middle of something?

"When's the sun going to come out?"

—It's over the crest.

"You better enjoy it while you can — That's all I've got to say."

—So many opportunities.

"When are we going home?"

—They have a good saying in Germany — "The cobbler should stick to the last!"

"I'll call you when I come in to the airport." [Pretending you'll drop everything, race to the airport, break all the taxi protocols, bribe the starters and police officers, miraculously find them, and for what?]

—Go over the top!

"If you are targeted by a cyberbully, stop, block and tell!"

—It's not going overboard for anything ... You have to find an inner barometer ... Life is what you say it is.

"That was a really nice response — It was so natural."

—They're not scripted.

"Is it working?"

—All things come to dogs who wait.

"Now as I sit here today, I don't know what is truth, and I don't know what isn't." [From Oprah Winfrey]

—I wouldn't worry ... Probably somewhere down deep there's a little kid that wants to come out ... Just face it: You're bad! ... The "oughts" ... A whiff of your mother's perfume ... Very little, but there's a leak ... Don't you put soapy water on and look for bubbles?

"What is truth?"

—You have to be very smart to be that happy . . . Never stand behind a car that's backing up!

"Is your show on?"

—I knew there was an ulterior motive.

"Is she here?" [Ignoring your girlfriend]

—Very hidden.

"Is that a boy or a girl?"

—A little of both.

"How is it?" [Your steak, veggies, potato, wine, service, conversation, vacation, sunburn, horror, tablecloth, salad dressing, soup, ....]

—It's perfect ... Just right! ... Pretty special.

"How's your soup?"

—If it's a parallel universe, how can you see it?

"Is everything prepared all right, Sir?"

—The whole thing.

"Is that a yes?"

—I don't know how else to put it.

"Is there anything else you want to tell me?"

—Without ice!

["Thank you."] "Uh-huh."

—And weird stuff.

["Thanks!"] "Yep."

—You hang tough!

["I do research on mean people, rude people, stupid people, phony people and bullies."] "Any tips?"

—They manipulate people for power ... You have to see the effect ... It hurts! ... They're tricking people ... They're not really tricking people, because they don't know what they're doing ... I say dodge 'em ... I say get out of their way ... Why should I let them hurt me? ... Why should I allege myself to scoundrels? ... Drop out! ... That's what I'm doing ... It's my body, it's my life, it's my choice ... It's just so obvious, you know? ... Less really is more.

—You can only be pleasantly surprised.

[A parking lot attendant using bureaucratic double talk to cheat you out of fifty cents]

—And they wonder why jazz is dead.

"I watched you carefully, and you didn't screw up once."

—I can't stand having to do things the right way.

"Good evening."

—Twilight – that blessed moment when body and soul are one.

"Have a nice night."

—Maybe I will.

"Why is it bad timing?"

—I'd like to, but I can't.

"I really need to get up early. How 'bout I call you a cab?"

—Who needs you?

"Good-bye ... have a good night."

—I do that all the time.

"Maybe we shouldn't see each other for a while."

—What's wrong with being yourself?