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Taunts, Insults or Attacks

Codewords Inside Aggressive "Tricks"

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The Way Out

 

CLINIC

PATIENT

DIAGNOSTIC

Patient refers to it as stargate-eight-four

A Turncoat.4

Interrogation.1

 

TOOLSET

INFORMAL FALLACY

 

Stick around! 

—WHO CARES?

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

TOO BAD! 

Moxie's

Disease

 

The Fallacy of Misleading Analogy — A person with vested interest to protect can seize on what you would consider an unimportant detail and magnify it out of due proportion - It's a thin line between celebration and menace - It could change in an instant.

 

NOTES TO MYSELF

PSYCHOLOGICAL AGE

CLASS

[boorishness & "energy suck"] - Deep-seated Festering Resentment Activated by a Stubborn Knot of Anger Wrapped Around Delusions Of Grandeur - Their parents were super-rats, and they're just small rats, so they get you to feel sorry for them, and then they stick the knife in you! - By completely ignoring things you say, they separate you from your sense of harmony, equilibrium and balance - They start exploding with imitations of their parents, provoking you with delusions of grandeur, making you feel lonely - All loneliness is separation anxiety, brought about by people who steal your attention - It feels like an energy suck because you're having to use a lot of energy to clamp down on the lid on your volcano - while they spout off about religion or whatever - Very few people know how to stand up to a religious yahoo, someone who likes to pretend they're allowed to say anything, and that you're not - Everyone is into, sooner or later, their mother and father will like them - so they believe in God or think they'll win the lottery, their "main chance" - They don't understand the difference between simply being themselves versus being snapped back by a mile-long tether into feeling (1.) punitive and angry or (2.) just plain miserable - If you know yourself, you're just a person. If you personally know God, you're hot shit.

The Age of Significance, ages 20-23

Rules

 

 
 
 
 
 

Exactly what someone said [or did]
... usually not very original.

The thoughts of a "bad child"
... to free your mind again.

TRICKS

WINGS

IDEAS

«boring»

Stick around!

 

"Your review was the dumbest thing I've ever read. It strains me to avoid profanity in describing how stupid you sound." (–Vitriolic e-mail to David Pogue, published in "The Voice-Off: Android Vs. Siri," The New York Times, 22 August 2013) :: WildCard-21

Stick around!

—You don't keep a winning streak alive just by chance.

"Never thought that so small woody exists."

Stick around!

Remember that?

"Girls prefer real things, not toothpicks."

Stick around!

—She's the type who screams, "Put the lid down or I'll fall in!"

"You can go to any college you want, except Harvard – I'm not paying for Harvard."

Stick around!

—What's in it for me? – Does that make you happy?

"Ritenour? Ritenour? What high school did you go to?"

Stick around!

—You're not cheated.

"Is it safe to send my kids to school tomorrow?" [After school gunfire]

Stick around!

—If they need your help, they'll ask, and if you don't want to do it, don't; ask yourself, what is being friendly to someone else? stand up for beauty; cling to your capacity for warmth; support people's efforts to be themselves; build your awareness; build your attention; build your consciousness; build your ability – where you do things from – greater; you should be proud of being alive.

"Hey, hey! Settle down!" [From a pedestrian who has no clue you blasted your horn three times to keep some idiot from backing their car into you]

—WHO CARES?

—The truth is something else! ... I'll never be strict enough for my mother! ... You can do whatever you want, but you should know what you're getting into ... The facts of life! ... Heaven is a taxi to the toilet in Berlin! ... If he comes home drunk on the back of a fire engine, we'll find out ... I wouldn't know anything about that ... Are you drug free?

[Car horn just so they can show you the finger]

—WHO CARES?

—The family curse, if you know what I mean.

[Car horn right in your ear, stuck in traffic]

—WHO CARES?

—What about the Surprise Symphony?

[Car horn / finger / drive-by combo]

—WHO CARES?

—IT WORKS!

[Beep!]

—WHO CARES?

—How about the wipers?

"Well, that's a safe bet."

Stick around!

—Jesus polished Elijah Muhammad's shoes.

"Hello, smallest meat of the year, how are you?"

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

—It's subsidized.

"I have an erection."

—TOO BAD!

—Take a bottle of Jesus juice and shove it up your ass ... No exaggeration!

"What is 'Slow gold?'"

—WHO CARES?

—David Brooks says, "Think about the traits that creative people possess. Creative people don't follow the crowds; they seek out the blank spots on the map. Creative people wander through faraway and forgotten traditions and then integrate marginal perspectives back to the mainstream. Instead of being fastest around the tracks everybody knows, creative people move adaptively through wildernesses nobody knows." ("The Creative Monopoly," The New York Times, April 23, 2012)

"Someday, someday, but certainly not now, I'd like to learn how to have a conversation."

Stick around!

—You don't know what a solution is if you've never seen one.

"I've been on that bus; they're just as good as gold." [From the 2012 documentary, Bully – See also stargate22, intimidation, lying]

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

—Being authentic ... Every week.

"I'm sorry – I know I'm bothering you."

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

—Stop trying to get other people to be more important than you are!

"I'm sorry I'm bothering you."

—WHO CARES?

—(If she's worried about you, she's getting you to believe she's important.)

"You know what? You're the best."

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

—Sometimes I wish I was a loud pushy person so you could hate me ... You could think about it that way, too.

"Aren't you a sweetheart?"

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

—Mean people can't stand it.

"Well, he did call you his sweetheart."

—WHO CARES?

—The thrill is gone.

"You're cute when you're losing."

—WHO CARES?

—Just once, dog! ... It won't kill you ... Most boring.

"I'm sure I'll get the usual wave of hate mail ('Duh, this has been around for years? Where have you been?') But I don't care. I didn't know the SkyDrive had been made so capacious and so free to all. It's worth the humiliation just to spread the word." (–David Pogue)

Stick around!

—Wearing short pants makes you feel vulnerable.

"God damn, I bet your dad'd be really shamed by you!" [A History of Violence, 2005]

—TOO BAD!

—I was a man of action as a child.

"Yeah, pussRun away!" [A History of Violence, 2005]

—TOO BAD!

—Stay close, boys, and I'll think of something! ... Exactly what those little kids in grammar school hate, that's what you are!

"If you're so rich, you can treat me again."

—TOO BAD!

—I like to feel I'm taking care of myself, but I know it's a delusion.

"Yeah! Tell it like it is, baby!"

—TOO BAD!

—Okay, so? ... Did we do anything wrong?

"You're my big baby!"

—TOO BAD!

—One family's enough.

"You're a woman!" [A woman striking out at her soon-to-be-ex-boyfriend]

—TOO BAD!

—You know what isn't going to happen ... All my questions are answered ... Giving us a break ... It could be anybody, right? ... It's like blood feuds ... Parents are tyrants.

"Thank you, baby!"

Stick around!

—She probably keeps them in a lower drawer next to her sneakers.

"Come on, baby, I'm tired of talking – a little less conversation and a little more action."

—TOO BAD!

—It's time to go! Musicians are supposed to be shaggy – It's part of the mystique.

"You're not working? No business?"

Stick around!

—I'm an importer of false eyelashes.

"You're the Antichrist."

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

—Not even that – It's just bad manners.

"You'll forget the way I look the minute ship leaves port."

—WHO CARES?

—You and me, babe – how 'bout it?

["What else can you do?"] "You can give blowjobs."

—TOO BAD!

Get lost! ... Good-bye ... High hopes ... Oh, it's you! It's nice to have a little kitten.

"If we reduce high-level executive compensation, the University won't be able to retain or attract top administrators."

Stick around!

—You know how relatives are ... and they pretend they know something, that's the problem ... It goes back to ancient times ... Let Jesus do it! ... That kid is smart!

"You have an attitude for a houseboy."

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

—I'm not afraid of that ... I just wanted to see what's going on.

"You're just trying to make people angry."

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

—I think I'm beyond that ... You just can't believe a word they say.

"You're not going to like this one bit."

—TOO BAD!

—Am I in the way?

"Don't blow it!"

Stick around!

—I hope I die in style.

"Now you're talking out of your ass."

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

—Call the police.

"Cry me a river."

Stick around!

—It's water over the dam.

"Cry baby! Cry to somebody else, not me!"

—WHO CARES?

—That was a cold cry.

"Baby! Baby! You are a baby!"

—TOO BAD!

—So oppressive.

["Three weeks after I got married, I knew it was a mistake."] "Was that in San Francisco?" [Codeword for "Are you gay?"]

—TOO BAD!

—That's a lot of real estate.

"You're getting spoiled."

—TOO BAD!

—Why do I feel like a baby when I sense myself?

"You're doing better than me."

Stick around!

—For some reason that's a no-no.

"You're going home alone, aren't you?"

Stick around!

—The rich are where the money is.

"I'm being punished."

Stick around!

—It's easier to learn how to be happy than than it is to learn how to suffer ... So seek happiness, fool!

["How are you doing?" "All right."] "If you're just all right, I don't know if you're ready to go on the radio."

Stick around!

—Well, that's what you say, you know? ... Fantastic!

"You've got the mentality of a twenty-year-old man." [Disparagingly ... (Sex!)]

—WHO CARES?

—This generation is more open than people know – It's just the Church people left behind.

"[Senator Obama] sees America, it seems, as being so imperfect that he's palling around with terrorists who would target their own country [William Ayers, founder of the Weather Underground and confessed bomber, with whom Mr. Obama had a fleeting association] And, according to The New York Times, he was a domestic terrorist and part of a group that, quote, 'launched a campaign of bombings that would target the Pentagon and our U.S. Capitol.'" (–Governor Sarah Palin, October 6, 2008, inciting members of the audience at a Clearwater, Florida political rally to cry out, "Boooo!" "Treason!" "Terrorist!" "KILL HIM!")

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

Let's not! ... You're an intelligent, growing mind ... I'm going to take you someplace nice.

"Everything always has to be black and white for you."

—WHO CARES?

—You're confused.

"You're being unreasonable."

Stick around!

—I'm the one who's ruining the atmosphere of Happy Hollow ... It's my attitude ... It's no good.

"You're being a psychobitch!"

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

—I'm not afraid of you – I'm afraid of my mother!

"taxi1010 stupid! You're doing it wrong."

—TOO BAD!

—Is this really evil?

"You're a nigger yourself."

—TOO BAD!

—You're much too plantation oriented – And who isn't?

"Don't forget who you're talking to!"

—TOO BAD!

—I don't know why, for a couple of thousand years, people can't see there's no god.

"It's a waste of gas." [Thursday rehearsal for a weekend Blue Angels air show]

Stick around!

—The room of rising fumes.

"The Polytechnic is history. Vietnam is history. Auschwitz is history. Hippies are history. Punks are history. God is history. Hollywood is history. The Soviet Union is history. My parents are history. My friend Joe is becoming history. I will become history. This fucking shithole planet will become history. Take more drugs." (–Christos Tsiolkas, extract from Loaded)

—TOO BAD!

—They always miss one thing ... I can endure.

"You're not on the list." [Trans: You're not on the five-member task force]

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

—I wouldn't bother with people I don't like . . . I appoint you to be keeper of the flame.

"What are you doing over there? You're supposed to be over here!"

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

—That's none of my business.

"We're doing the basement, remember?"

Stick around!

—Save it!

"Life is a compromise."

—TOO BAD!

—It's always better not to do anything permanent at first.

"Is there any compromise?"

—TOO BAD!

—I hope you don't mind – I get angry, too.

"Compromise."

—TOO BAD!

—There's safety in slowland, right?

"My God! You're so rich!" [Cash you carry to make change]

—WHO CARES?

—As much as it hurts me ... but you have to pay me five dollars!

"Do I know you from someplace?"

—TOO BAD!

—Let that be a lesson to you.

"Anything's possible."

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

—Even happiness?

"Nothing is impossible."

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

—They really believe that radio tubes are going to power locomotives – They must have a divine belief in their ability – It's delusions of grandeur.

"I had a nightmare – I dreamt I was back in the radio room."

Stick around!

—And you don't need it.

"Oh, go back to Ohio."

—WHO CARES?

—I do worse things than you.

"Oh, my God! – This is really a nightmare."

Stick around!

—You have to put yourself first.

"People think they have to memorize everything."

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

—The big thing is in knowing who to avoid.

"You're a long ways from home."

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

—It would take a long time to paint a turtle on top of a bird on top of a snake on top of a heron, as seen from above.

"Now you're being smart with me."

Stick around!

—Breaking rules – Everyone has the right to be what they are!

"You better take care of yourself! You're lucky I don't kick your motherfucking ass!"

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

—MY GOOD MAN, I NEVER DID ANYTHING TO HARM YOU.

"Go back to San Francisco, man!"

Stick around!

—WHY ARE YOU TALKING TO ME THIS WAY?

"Probably molests little girls."

Stick around!

—Poor kids, no? How little we know.

"Only in San Francisco."

Stick around!

—At least LA is really dirty.

"Oh, pul-lease!"

Stick around!

—You know, you don't have to eat any of it if you don't like it.

"Are you a candidate for sainthood?" [From a well-dressed gentleman ambushing you at your car with an elaborate, swiftly changing story]

—WHO CARES?

—Aaron T. Beck says, "There is more to the surface than meets the eye."

"They say he's the last Pope before the coming of the Antichrist."

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

—He's too nice to be the Pope.

"Is arrogance and unwavering self-regard the antidote to guilt?"

Stick around!

—You win – You win again – You're very tricky.

"You are being judgmental and petty."

Stick around!

—Me and my big mouth – How can you kill someone who's already dead?

"If the shoe fits, wear it."

—TOO BAD!

—The shoe's on the other foot.

"You can't buy affection ... except maybe at pet stores."

Stick around!

—A dog from Africa! In the wilds of the north.

"You're too introspective."

Stick around!

—Are you holding it hostage?

"I've got a date with my husband."

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

—Too bad I wasn't just dreaming.

"Rich kids' school."

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

—It's one of the ways your tribe is allowed to express anger – You know, lording it over other people ... sending food back.

"I see a sad, lonely, angry, isolated boy."

Stick around!

—Even if he lives on Mars.

"Is it till death do us part?"

Stick around!

—That's what life is, pretending you're dead.

"I know what those guys are up to – I've seen it before."

Stick around!

—Why would they bury two people in one grave?

"They park there, saying they just can't hold it any longer."

—WHO CARES?

—It's nice out.

"Then they go into the rest room and swap tickets with one of their buddies – That's why he's all angry."

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

—It's so nice out, I could leave it out all day.

"The guard knows all about it and won't let them back in line."

—TOO BAD!

—All is revealed.

"See? That aggravates me."

Stick around!

—You'll do all right.

[Someone boring you to death at a party]

Stick around!

—Giraffes.

"You know, you don't take criticism well."

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

—It goes without saying.

"What did you spend it on?" [All your credit card debt]

—TOO BAD!

—Lightning bugs.

"Don't spend it all in one place."

—TOO BAD!

—The wishing well.

"Know-it-all."

Stick around!

—Another racket.

"Smart aleck, smarty-pants!"

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

—I'm surprised it's legal.

"I hate blondes; I hate all blondes."

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

—A specialist.

"The Supreme Court needs to be five to four in favor of God, not in favor of Norman Lear, NOW, NARAL and other Anti-God, Anti Marriage things, or this nation will get God real mad!" (–Pat Robertson)

Stick around!

—A university on the moon: Moon U.

"Israel is the root of evil."

Stick around!

—At least I'm not a lying pig ... I understand what goodness and decency are.

"I think we should allow more impartial studies to be done on this." (–President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad of Iran, questioning the evidence that the Holocaust ever happened, 20 Sep 2006)

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

—"I used to read, but it's faster to make up stuff." (–Dilbert)

"I don't believe the Holocaust ever happened."

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

—You're not only mixed up, but you're a nincompoop.

"It's not in the New Testament."

—TOO BAD!

—The Bible is in you – You're not in the Bible.

"Blow me – It's show business."

—TOO BAD!

—You can't be grown-up.

"You can start sucking my cock!"

—TOO BAD!

—You bought a bad nightclub act for yourself.

["This is not an asthma symphony!" After asking you one question about your asthma, your mother thinks she can proceed with an unrelenting barrage of intimate questions about your asthma in front of your girlfriend]

—TOO BAD!

—It's good when people know what they can't do.

[Someone reciting poetry in your face. (You can see this as one of the compulsive utterances of Tourette's syndrome) What they really want is attention; it's up to you which way you pay attention to them]

—TOO BAD!

—In a hundred years it will be fabulous.

"Some people think they have to put on the glitter."

—TOO BAD!

—There's only so much you can do.

"Well, I'm thrilled that you're happy."

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

—This is a good time to have a liberal-arts education.

"You're right – I'm wrong."

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

—Why should you be?

"I'm always wrong – You're always right."

—TOO BAD!

—It's all a transference.

"What? You're leaving now? Aren't you going to stay and help with the dishes?"

—TOO BAD!

—I learned it from you!

"Trying to be something that you're not."

Stick around!

—You know, you're a whole person – You don't want to get stuck in one part of you.

"You're still safe."

Stick around!

—Do you sit on the giant turtles?

"You're asking too many questions."

Stick around!

—Every day is the day of the dead.

"You're nothing."

Stick around!

—Just don't join the Nazi party.

"Suck my cock!"

—TOO BAD!

—I bet you it's better – Unless you think you're God or something.

"You're not."

Stick around!

—It's an accommodation to nature that's successful.

"You're a woman!"

Stick around!

—You have to be quick.

"Bend over."

—TOO BAD!

—Get a dog – A dog won't care if you're an asshole.

"You've already taken this class."

Stick around!

—I keep saying someone should.

"Put a lid on it, Bozo."

Stick around!

—Bozo makes people laugh.

"Sorry to bore you."

—TOO BAD!

—It all depends on what you take seriously.

"I was just being friendly."

Stick around!

—It means you're a very deep person ... Not too friendly, not too weird ... Very loyal ... For ever so many years ... Friendly is not the same thing as friends ... It can go just one way: we can A vast herd. Hiding me... There's no work in relationships ... They're just people ... They either get along or they don't ... May your time machine not stop in the dark cave ... Hiding out in the basement sharing secrets with your best friend: sneaky and happy and honest ... The way you can bring back those wonderful days: living with a mystery.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
 

REFLECTIONS

 
 
 
 
 

18-JUL-1999.

Not Suffering by Comparison

Just because you are standing somewhere, does not necessarily mean you are standing in a line. Just because you defer to an authority figure, does not necessarily mean you are prepared to suck their cock. Just because you park your car in front of someone's house, does not necessarily mean you are violating their property rights. Just because you have a dog named Hermes, does not necessarily mean you have herpes. Just because you have a little money, does not necessarily mean you are going to blow it away. Just because you are an attractive person, does not necessarily mean you are someone's babe, or honey, or sweetie. Just because you have a bemused facial expression, does not necessarily mean something is wrong or something is the matter. Just because you are taking a walk in the neighborhood, does not necessarily mean you are taking a vacation. Just because you know a little something, does not necessarily mean you have to explain yourself. Just because someone makes a lewd proposition, does not necessarily mean you have to jump into their stinking gutter.

Stay up on the sidewalk.


06-OCT-2014.

 

Thick
of
It

ShortCuts

Top
of
Page

 

15-NOV-2008.

On a Certain Drained Feeling
You Get Around Total Bores

They corner you at a party.

They deftly change the subject.

Suddenly they're talking about money
or housing regulations or all their relatives.

These are things you can't prove
as being true or untrue.


11-NOV-1999.

Bo-ring! Snor-o Bor-o Energy Sucks!

People who bore you half to death, at a party or other social occasion, are generally using the Fallacy of Misleading Analogy. You get the idea they're going on and on about something without the slightest inkling you want them to stop! Just because you gave them a little attention (on a whim), does not necessarily mean you're prepared to be a captive audience (or victim).

Essentially, as they start to go on and on about something-or-other, the animal in you (your instincts or Id) feels like murdering them, for ignoring you, for not assessing your previous expertise in the matter, for not even seeing you just don't care. Then, to maintain your position as a God-fearing member of civilization, the overlord in you (your ideals or Superego) clamps down hard on your impulses to kill them, and the net effect of these two self-annihilating expenditures of energy is the distinct (and real) impression that your energy is being sucked away by something you don't understand.

You tend to blame it on the other person, the Snor-o Bor-o Energy Suck.

However, there is a way out. You simply repeat, in a circular queue, the following four phrases: "Stick around!" "WHO CARES?" "A vast herd. Hiding me." and "TOO BAD!" When you get to end of the list, you start at the beginning. (It will eventually get rid of 'em!)

Here's an example. I was gazing at the food cart, specifically at a banana, in the airport taxi garage, when suddenly we all hear the screeching of tires, and looking up, see a Yellow Taxi racing off, away from the guard who is waving overflow taxis back out to the freeway.

The taxi driver standing next to me suddenly starts to say, "I know what those guys are up to – I've seen it before."

I keep looking at him, not knowing what to say.

"They park there," he goes on, "saying they just can't hold it any longer. Then they go into the rest room and swap tickets with one of their buddies – That's why he's all angry."

I still don't know what to say.

Taking my silence as a cue to continue, he goes on, "The guard knows all about it and won't let them back in line."

I'm actually flabbergasted by this idea, and taking my facial expression as a cue to start over, the guy actually starts telling me the same theory from the beginning! Even as I'm walking briskly away without my banana!

Finally, I manage to blurt out, "—TOO BAD!" breaking the spell. The guy gives a surprised laugh, drops from the chase, and leaves me alone.

Now. Here's the way it should have gone, had I been true to that banana:

"I know what those guys are up to – I've seen it before."

Stick around!

"They park there, saying they just can't hold it any longer."

—WHO CARES?

"Then they go into the rest room and swap tickets with one of their buddies – That's why he's all angry."

—A vast herd. Hiding me.

"The guard knows all about it and won't let them back in line."

—TOO BAD!

See? I didn't change anything, but I got my banana.

Ø  ¥

CODE WORDS: action, administrators, affection, aggravates, angry, Antichrist, anything's, arrogance, attract, Auschwitz, baby, basement, [beep!], bend, black, blondes, blow, blowjobs, bombings, bore, [boring], «boring», bothering, bothers, Bozo, bus, capacious, class, cock, compensation, compromise, conversation, criticism, cry, devoid, dumbest, erection, executive, friendly, gas, glitter, gold, guard, Harvard, high-level, Holocaust, [horn], houseboy, I've, impartial, impossible, [inciting], isolated, Israel, judgmental, kids', know-it-all, leaves, longer, memorize, mentality, molests, nation, nightmare, Ohio, palling, petty, profanity, psychobitch, pul-lease, punished, puss, [reciting], reduce, retain, Ritenour, safe, sainthood, San Francisco, self-regard, settle, shamed, shoe, smart aleck, smarty-pants, someplace, smallest, spend, spoiled, spread, strains, sweetheart, terrorists, Testament, till, toothpicks, unreasonable, [unrelenting], wave, woody, you're

 

LXXXIV
Ursa Minor
"Small bear"

—A vast herd. Hiding me.