Diving Under Bullies,
Whom They Say Want
Power & Respect


OUCH ... Not quite ... All right ... We'll see ... Nothing fancy.


I would like to add a wee bit of tonic – and fortifying expertise – to the problem of bullies, ("School Bullying and Violence,") who may or may not want a "quick-fix" of respect, I'm not quite sure, because the ship has sailed off. When I'm not flipping around in the ocean here, climbing up on a raft from time to time, I'm an urban transport specialist back in San Francisco CA USA, where I sell people taxi rides!


My sister and I run taxi1010.com; I'm Richard Ames Hart, she's Amoret Phillips. Pretty grassroots. Some of the people in my taxicab carry guns and knives; others fancy themselves on very important missions; others let their minds go, playing the absent-minded tourist, with family; all enjoying the exquisite sights back in San Francisco. I'm just like them. I'm like them all, even the bullies! What we all have in common is our humanity, the dreams we have at night, and our growing understanding. With that in mind, I do everyday research on sticking up for yourself ... no matter what! ... though now find myself smack in the middle of the ocean, climbing back up onto this life raft.


What you need to know is very little ... though to find that little takes very, very much! I always thought it would be cool to know the fewest set of comebacks for sticking up for yourself, under any and all circumstances, and offer my sincere findings here, before we go under:


"OUCH ... Not quite ... All right ... We'll see ... Nothing fancy." Those are universal responses you need for climbing up onto a life raft with some unknown. The guy's asleep now, so I can safely use my flashlight. Thank goodness! I'll find out who he is.


I've got the ship's manifest here, and the invited guests included Thomas Jäger (Germany / moderator), Joaquín Mora-Merchán (Spain / moderator), Urban Lissman (Germany / moderator), Julia Riebel (Germany / moderator), Paul Horton (Denmark), Kevin Perry (Denmark), Catherine Blaya (France), Werner Ebner (Germany), Tamara Ebner (Germany), Catarina Katzer (Germany), Ulrich Krämer (Germany), Marcus Lüpke (Germany), Stephen Minton (Ireland), Mona O'Moore (Ireland), Oliviero Facchinetti (Italy), Beatrice Roselletti (Italy), Rinus Rodenberg (Netherlands), Jörgen Stoute (Netherlands), Helga Johannessen (Norway), Juan Calmaestra Villén (Spain), Fuensanta Cerezo (Spain), Mar’a José Mohedano García (Spain), Juan Manuel Munoz Gonzalez (Spain), Antonio Jesús Rodriguez Hildalgo (Spain), Victoria Trianes Torres (Spain), Bo Munthe (Sweden), who said, "I find it difficult to spread the knowledge of how to create a safe school environment," Serdar Degirmencioglu (Turkey), Can Gezgör (Turkey), Kazim Alat (Turkey), Peter Smith (UK), Andy Hickson (UK) , Claire Monks (UK), Colin Moorhouse (UK), Rob Osborn (UK), Sue Sanders (UK), Robert Slonje (UK), Aramis Lopes (Brazil), Marisol Moreira (Uruguay), Colleen Taylor (Canada), Elisabeth Englander (USA), Paul Guerino (USA), Angi Littlejohn (USA), Tom Letson (USA), Sandra Peters (USA), Andy Tomko (USA), Nancy Willard (USA), Loreine Wynne (USA), Marilyn Campbell (Australia), John Fenaughty (New Zealand), and Imelda Kemeza (Uganda), who said, "Shared knowledge is a treasure to a growing mind."


While the ship was still around, with me a stealthy stowaway, I found an anonymous website called "Verbal Self-Defense" which started out with four attacks:


"You can't do anything right!"


"Why do you have to be so stupid?"


"Shut up!"


"You're a freak!"


I was so curious how the writer would respond to these attacks, and instead, was treated to a lengthy analysis of four fictional characters:


(1.) The Insecure Authoritarian, trying to boost their own power by stripping you of yours (Don't confront him; go along with him; embarrass him later) Suggested response: "I agree." (2.) The Abusive Victim, blaming you, using outright lies (Don't accept blame; don't argue; don't let their problem become yours) Response: "I see." (3.) The Bored Cynic, using sarcasm, a dimwit's brand of comedy (Play dead; become a bored, unresponsive audience) Response: "I'm bored." (4.) The Bully, temporarily boosting their own self-esteem by intimidating others (Avoid them; practice self-assertive comeback lines; learn a martial art) Response: "I'm confident."


Since I was an uninvited guest on the ship, I couldn't say that much, though was curious to test my "universal responses" on the writer's four unaddressed attacks:


"You can't do anything right!"
—Just wait!
—In psychology it's called regression in service of the ego; you know you're gathering yourself in a certain way.


"Why do you have to be so stupid?"
—Not quite.
—Until now!
—You can bet on it.


"Shut up!"
—All right.
—A joke!
—Come on, we both know I can't do that.


"You're a freak!"
—We'll see.
—Oh, yeah!
—A lot now, huh?


"Anything new?"
—Nothing fancy.
—Nothing we haven't planned for.


That's when someone caught me and tossed me off the ship. "You weren't invited!" they called out after my plummeting body, uncurling and hitting the water in a perfect half gainer, crying out for the benefit of any sharks, —OUCH.


The trouble with me is, whenever anyone attacks me with words, I forget everything ... except "OUCH ... Not quite ... All right ... We'll see ... Nothing fancy."


As far as I'm concerned, a bully – just a battered-about person like me, who has found his way into the back seat of my taxicab, back in San Francisco – is simply a high-maintenance friend ... someone who's paying me! ... a diamond in the rough!


"What the hell do you think you're doing?"
—Nothing fancy.
Aw, shucks!
—Some people can admit they're not happy.