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Taunts, Insults or Attacks

Codewords Inside Aggressive "Tricks"

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The Way Out





Patient refers to it as stargate-six-four

A Blowhard.4






—Probably – Something.

Go on!

—At first. This is the gold!

—Among others.




Dementia Praecox —
Once you have established someone is crazy, you can pretty much just say, "—Probably," to everything they say.





[fast & loose logic] - Crazy, Paranoid or Affected, they play fast and loose with logic - If you're smart, they call you insane or crazy - They speak in clichés, leaping from one inappropriate metaphor, or forceful comment, to another, without stopping - Usually when you feel uncomfortable, there's a reason - Someone wants you to - The way they do it is by hitting you in the imagination.

The Age of Detachment, ages 16-19




Exactly what someone said [or did]
... usually not very original.

The thoughts of a "bad child"
... to free your mind again.




"A sense of humor is knowing what's important."


—I didn't sneeze.

"Do you know you're in a crosswalk?" [From a wacky pedestrian]

—At first. This is the gold!

—You'll do all right ... You're not a kid anymore ... I'm an American! ... Everyone has something wrong with them, and I stink! ... Maybe there something going on that you don't see ... Always butting in.

"Hey! Punch me in, too, will ya'?"

Go on!

—Who else does?

"You can be replaced."

Go on!

—They train you to work, shut up, and do what you're supposed to do.

"I'm saving myself for you!"

Go on!

—Between you and me, I wouldn't bother.

"My microphone fell off." (–Carolyn Johnson, sexy co-anchor of ABC7 News)

Go on!

—We'll put it outside the window.

"Richard will celebrate by wearing underpants on his head."

Go on!

—I don't do that stuff.

"Have you been saving any money?"

Go on!

—You can't act like a ninny.

"Let's see ... and your mother went to Wellesley?"

Go on!

—That's the price of intelligence.

"The authorities don't seem to understand the way Twitter works. There's no provision in the law for people being hyperbolic, sarcastic or ironic. For a country that prides itself on its sense of irony, that is unfortunate." (–Padraig Reidy, news editor of Index on Censorship, a London magazine that covers free-speech issues)


—I'm in a minor rage.

["The freight trains headed north are all empty and the freight trains headed south are all full."] "Makes sense."

Go on!

—The bottom fell out of the quail market.

"Keep people straight!"

Go on!

—The more chaotic things are, the more a decent person can get by with a nice life ... Everyone who wants to can have a good life ... If you're clever, you can get through things ... The whole place is pink! ... Thank you for coming.

"You take care of all those bullies!"

Go on!

—Thank you so much.

"So you're back online again? What a wonderful feeling, to be connected again."

—Among others.

—I'm a Colossus that strides two worlds!

"What do you do about bullies?"


—Get out of the way, hide ... That's right, hide! ... Vita umbrellis ... Life in the shade.

"Psst ... Susie! What's 12 + 7 ?" (–Calvin)


—A billion. (–Susie)

"You're not in our gang – This is a private club – You can't be a member." [To a four-year-old girl]


—One person could have changed your entire life.

"You're not a member."


Stuck in my heart! ... N.I.N.J.A. – No Income, No Job or Assets.

"In your face! – Freak you!" [Middle school talk]

—At first. This is the gold!

—Too bad, Gringo! ... The hand of Death will brush your wing ... Greed and fear run the world! ... Don't get into bad habits ... Poke out is better than poke in! ... Love knocks! ... I'd tell ya, but then I'd have to kill ya!

[Distraught woman whose dog has been bitten at the dog park]

—Among others.

—They're very mean people ... Very dry skin ... That's the kind of thing that never happened to us ... Yeah, and no one was there to take pictures! ... Who doesn't have AIDS? ... How about pictures of a beautiful doggie?

"My house, my rules – You're just a guest."


—It gets cheap really fast.

"You will abide by the rules of this house and respect people who are different."


—I just killed the Pope.

"It's our house and they have to respect it. It's our way or the highway."


—"The past is the only dead thing that smells sweet." (–Edward Thomas, 1917)

"How long, Sawyer? How long can we play house?"

—Among others.

—I'll give you two weeks' notice.

"It has to come from the heart."

—Among others.

—That's the best I can do, I think.

"You're all heart."


—Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers.

"You're sweet."


—The secret cheating ways to play ... See Kiss Student.

"The problem with crazy ... Is the vast volumes in which it comes. The only crazy site I've ever looked at for more than 5 minutes was taxi1010. I kept coming close - so close! - to grasping the logic of the place that I was teased to look a little further. Everywhere else is like this blog, just pages and pages and pages that might as well say 'crazy' over and over again for all the good it does me to look at them." [Further mention of taxi1010 at Portal of Evil - by Theocrat 12/30/05]

—Among others.

—A song goes round the world.

"You Chinese think you own everything – Get off my road!"

Go on!

—There's very few left.

"Doesn't make any fucking sense!" [Viciously]

—Among others.

—What are you going to do?

"My toaster has been talking to me."

—Among others.

—Maybe they do ... Everyone's got things but us ... They break, too, you know? ... It's like Jack Nicholson visiting you.

"Is she adopted?"

Go on!

—How long do you think that'll last? ... I know things about Jesus you'll never know ... There's nothing too advanced for children ... They're way ahead of us ... You may remember your birth.

"Crazy comebacks."

—Probably – Something.

—Like a bolt action in a rifle.

"Mom, was I adopted?"

Go on!

—Can you remember?

"There's a thesis right there. [At this website] I spent about five days winding my way through the obsessive links and trying to figure out the guy's modus operandi. It never happened. I mean, he's crazy as a loon, but he also seems to be entirely sane."


—If you sit in a hammock and read a book, that's one thing ...

"It kinda makes you wish you had schizoid tendencies, just so you could have your own self-imposed system of order to make sense of everything."

—Among others.

—If you hurt yourself, that's something else.

"Are you still watching that stupid show on 'Heart?'"


—Some small thing.

["Those are pictures of Virginia stabbing me in the heart."] "Virginia doesn't have a heart."

Go on!

—Imagine having two of them.

"She doesn't have a heart." [Your girlfriend]

—At first. This is the gold!

—What a society girl, huh?

[Dramatic laughter]

—At first. This is the gold!

—It's funny, huh?

[Uproarious laughter]

—At first. This is the gold!

—It takes all kinds, huh?

[Malevolent laughter just the moment you stop to adjust your belt]

—At first. This is the gold!

—You will not look now! [Darth Vader voice] See? You're not looking.

[Vicious mock laughter]

—At first. This is the gold!

—But you have to keep your eye on the sparrow.

"It stinks! – It's a fucking latrine."

—Among others.

—Everyone has bad days.

"Love stinks, baby!"

—Among others.

—It's not a bad thing to do.

"Grovel, Paris, grovel!"

Go on!

—Too many things at once.

"Are you a member here?" [From an eight-year-old]

—At first. This is the gold!

—For hundreds of years, for thousands of years!

"Well, I haven't ever seen you here before."

Go on!

—Getting up there, guy!

"Were you invited?"

—At first. This is the gold!

—From the middle of nowhere.

"Did you graduate?"

—At first. This is the gold!

—Living dangerously, huh?

"Do you have a degree?"

—Among others.

—It's in the toilet.

"What did you get your degree in?"

—Among others.

—Having fun!

"That explains it." [Sarcastically]

—At first. This is the gold!

—I try everything.

"I'm the only one – I keep saying something wrong."

Go on!

—In just the right way.

"I think you're doing really good – Keep it up!"

—Among others.

—It doesn't take much, does it?

"Keep dreaming."

—Among others.

—Is that legal?

"Keep trying!"

—Among others.

—Lay low!

"As I thought ... your site identifies a long-standing pathology."

Go on!

—I guess we'll see you on CNN Financial News.

"You gotta take what you can get."

—At first. This is the gold!

—What time does the train pull out?

"You gotta love Mel Torme."

Go on!

—It could be something from childhood.

"You gotta have dog food."

—Among others.

—What would Jesus do?

"Do you put toilet paper on so it unrolls outside or inside?"

—Among others.

—It's not my fault if I'm rich.

"I'm confused ... as usual."

—Among others.

—It's that time of year!


—Among others.

—This is my year of surprises.

"This is right up your alley."

—Among others.

—You can't ask for more than that.

"The people who work there don't like it if you call it an alley."

Go on!

—The truth comes out.

"Oh, you're just like a member of the family!"


—Not your mother, I hope.

"Huh?" [Feigning innocence]

—Among others.


"You know, I should put my car up, huh?"

—At first. This is the gold!

—You've got a date with destiny.

"You're just here to look, huh?"

—At first. This is the gold!

—Where have I been?

"Getting tired of looking at all those cars, huh?"

Go on!

—My karma ran over my dogma.

"No good, huh?"

Go on!

—It started somewhere.

"Easy as that, huh?"

Go on!

—People have been very kind to me, and told me what to say to nitwits.

"That's why you should have one in your garage."

Go on!

—Sometimes love works.

"They've still got a lot of bounce to them."

Go on!

—It's nature's way.

"We don't wear shoes in this house."

—Among others.

—But less.

"How's your house?"

Go on!

—I'll have to build a bigger box.

"What a great day! Can't beat this!"

Go on!

—Not lately.

"Beat you to it!"

—Among others.

—You can see the magic moment arriving, can't you?

"Yours is probably faster, anyway."

—Among others.

—Rich is the night, cocoa hue; tender delight, Afro blue.

"What does your husband do that drives you nuts?"

—Among others.

—It's better than being asleep.

"Are you nuts?"


—I didn't mean to insult you.

"Are you off your rocker?"

—At first. This is the gold!

—It's camel time! No one's on time!

"Are u a virgin?"

—At first. This is the gold!

—It's gorgeous ... I have no idea ... I don't know why they stick things where they stick 'em.

"Are you a virgin?"

—At first. This is the gold!

—They lie!

["What is a nightclub?"] "Oh my god, you don't know what a nightclub is? You must be a virgin."

—At first. This is the gold!

[See Icarus and the Gutter Snipe]

"Are you faithful?"

—At first. This is the gold!

—Don't tip anyone off.

"Are you on glue?"


—You just think you're the only one.

"Are you sniffing glue?"

Go on!

—People who do what they damn well please are lunatics!

"Popo Power is Putrid!"


—Like you!

"Hey, look at the freak!"

Go on!

—A singing nerve!

"What a freak."

—At first. This is the gold!

—Starved for affection.

"I don't know if you're being cute or crazy now."

—Among others.

—And aren't you lucky?

"You're crazy!"


—But you don't know on which side.

"You used to thrill me, baby."

—Among others.

—I'd like to run through your hair – barefoot!

"You used to be sort of a funny, charming, likable guy."

Go on!

—You're kind of a burnt biscuit, aren't you?

"She used to be beautiful."

Go on!

—Did it bring back memories?

"What's 2024 times 18 minus 100?"


—There are three kinds of people — those who can count and those who can't.

"What's it cost to bring up a web site?"


—It's fwee!

"It doesn't cost you anything?"

Go on!

—A cut above the crowd, as they used to say.

"It's a cut above where you come from."


—Just like Rome – It's going.

"How much does it cost for a personalized tag like that?"


—Stifle your artistic impulses!

"You got a bottle of wine? $4.79?"


—It's that attention to detail – something small that's really expensive.

"Go that way if it makes you happier."


—That's quite a range, isn't it?

"Do you like lavender and sage?"

Go on!

—What about your friends?

"How much does it cost?"


—Youth must be served.

"Everything is always under development."


—It's different stages.

"Is it all under control here?"

—At first. This is the gold!

—Underneath it all.

"Under where?"

Go on!

—I made you say, "underwear!"

"Am I the only person who can't figure out this verbal self defence site??? The answers don't make sense.??" [Link from one of the msn groups, entitled PSYCHOPATH]

—Among others.

—That's an old one for around here.

"I suspect this site makes perfect sense only after consuming a few of those funny biscuits they sell at 'alternative gatherings.' Any other time - what the?! Very odd."


—I must have grabbed it and eaten it in my sleep.

"Thanks for validating my reality!! I thought it was just me. LOL."

Go on!

—Okay! Another adventure in stupidity.

"I'd spend more time reading this site, but I'm worried that it would start to make sense to me: Taxi 1010" [Link from]

—Among others.

—Why take a chance?

"You're really sweet. I enjoyed tonight, too. But you know, we both have our lives."

—Among others.

—Someone nice gave me that.
























Quietly Understated Illumination Zone

Surfing along, you may have been exposed to more material than you realize, so in the grand tradition of schools throughout Western Civilization, let's take a peek backward (or onward or inward!) — Please take out a sheet of paper and use your EMOTIONS to respond to the following stimuli:

A. People who can't say or even think the word, "shit," are at a terrible disadvantage in our modern progressive society.

B. "Straight arrow, huh?"

C. "Remember, only one person can win, so please give a big round of applause to our third runner-up (It's you, honey!)"

D. "We're calling to tell you you've won the Pulitzer Prize."

E. "I just can't believe you have an imperfection."

F. Some people present the world in a descriptive manner, allowing the listener freedom of action. For instance, "It's really raining!" Other people present the world in a proscriptive manner, suggesting particular behavior. For instance, "You better wear your raincoat!" If you hear a proscriptive insult, you have a wonderful opportunity to bounce it right back: "Let's stick to the facts here."

G. When a lady therapist telephoned to learn my qualifications for teaching Non-escalating Verbal Self-Defense, I told her I was tainted by driving a taxi. Her voice changed, and she suddenly started pretending I had called her by saying, "Well, why don't you give me a call after the first of the year?"

H. It's very hard for nice people to show their teeth, or to snarl at mean people, even though it's the kind thing to do. If a mean person sees you can defend yourself, they sometimes accuse you of trying to start a fight. What can you say to temper their flames?

I. Just because someone asks you to take a quiz doesn't mean you have to take it seriously. All questions on this page can be answered by saying, "—Probably," "—Something," "—Go on!" or "—Among others." Go on!







As follows

CODE WORDS: +, abide, above, adopted, alley, authorities, beat, biscuits, [bitten], bounce, bullies, connected, cost, crazy, crosswalk, degree, [distraught], enjoyed, explains, faithful, faster, freak, gang, garage, gotta, graduate, grovel, happier, haven't, heart, highway, house, huh, hyperbolic, invited, ironic, irony, keep, [laughter], lavender, member, microphone, minus, nsfw, nuts, pathology, prides, punch, putrid, replaced, road, rocker, sage, saving, sense, sexist, stinks, sweet, tendencies, thesis, toaster, typical, under, underpants, unrolls, used, usual, validating, virgin, Wellesley, winding, wine


"Fire bird"

Go on!